one day, met an old friend and had a conversation like these..
A: my friend, long time no see..how r u?
B: not doing so well..juz got back from hospital..
A: hospital? why? what happen to ur hair? look like its dying..
B: yes my friend..i juz doing my chemotherapy..coz there is something is growing inside me..its getting bigger day by day..
A: is it what i think it is?
B: yes..i got cancer..i have tried everything, lots of medicine..but its not working..doctor said it already stage 2..dunno till when..but i got a few months left..i haven't seen anyone for quite sometime..i dunno how to tell my family, friend and my love one..
its a real conversation between me and my friend..
if u had these conversation, what would u do? would u cry?
lagu ni buat angah sayu.. angah tujukan lagu ni utk ibu..
Tertanam naluri keibuan amat mendalam Di jiwa insan yang mendambakan kebahagiaan Oh... ibu
Di bahumu tergalas beban Perjalananmu penuh rintangan Kau titipkan kasih sayang Sejujur pengorbanan Tak ku nafikan Di saat kita berjauhan Rasa ingin ku berlari Mendakapimu penuh girang Bak si kecil kehilangan
Kau insan penyayang Betapa ku merindu Lembutnya belaian ibu Membuatku terlena
Di wajah terlukis tenang Debar di dada kau rahsiakan Ku pastikan dikau aman Dikurnia sejahtera Tak ku lupakan
Di saat kita berjauhan Rasa ingin ku berlari Mendakapimu penuh girang Bak si kecil kehilangan Tiada aku tanpa ibu Hanya (kau) satu didunia Bertakhta dikau dijiwaku Kau lah ibu yang tercinta
Kau insan pengasih Betapa aku mengharap Hadirnya restumu ibu Membawaku ke syurga Bersemi belaian kasih sayang nan berpanjangan Darimu insan yang mendoakan kebahagiaan anak-anakmu
<3 u =)
::: p/s: ibu, angah rindukan ibu.. angah syg ibu.. x kira berapa kali angah buat salah dari kecik smpai skrg pd ibu pun, ibu slalu maafkan angah.. angah tau walau sebesar mana pun dugaan yg ditempuhi ibu tetap kuat.. bile angah call ibu slalu ckp i luv u.. buat angah rindu.. walaupun angah jauh, ibu satu2 nya insan yg slalu ada bila angah perlukan.. angah bersyukur ada ibu yg sgt prihatin dan penyayang mcm ibu.. tp angah risau sbb sejak dua menjak ni ibu slalu sakit.. dah beberapa kali angah sendiri yg hantar ibu msok wad.. angah risau dgn kesihatan ibu.. angah hrp ibu ingat pesan angah supaya jaga kesihatan ok.. angah nk ibu slalu sht.. nnt klo angah blk kite boleh borak2, kite kua jln2 k.. angah suka borak2 dgn ibu sbb ibu slalu bercerita tanpa henti.. wlpn x henti2, tp itu yg buat angah rindu dgn ibu..hikhik.. ibu take care k! nnt angah blk umah tau.. luv u ibu! :) :::
Bahagia itu dari dalam diri
Kesannya zahir rupanya maknawi
Terpendam bagai permata di dasar hati
Bahagia itu ada pada hati
Bertakhta di kerajaan diri
Terbenam bagai mutiara di lautan nurani
Bahagia itu ada di jiwa
Mahkota di singgahsana rasa
Bahagia itu adalah suatu ketenangan
Bila susah tiada gelisah
Bila miskin syukur pada Tuhan
Bila sakit tiada resah di jiwa
Bukankah Tuhan telah berfirman
Ketahuilah dengan mengingati Allah
Jiwa kan menjadi tenang
Kebahagiaan itu suatu kesyukuran
Bila kaya jadi insan pemurah
Bila berkuasa amanah
Bila berjaya tidak alpa
Bila sihat tidak lupakan Tuhan
Hakikatnya bahagia itu
Adalah ketenangan
Bila hati mengingati Tuhan
Semua insan kan mengerti
Maksud terseni Ilahi
Itulah zikir yang hakiki
note:
bahagia itu bkn pada harta yg byk
tetapi pada jiwa yg tenang
dan ketenangan itu dtg nya dr Allah SWT..
semoga semua insan kn berbahagia di dunia & akhirat
amin...
Don't pretend you're sorry,
I know you're not.
You know you got the power,
To make me weak inside.
And girl you leave me breathless,
But it's ok.
'Cause you are my survival,
Now hear me say. I can't imagine life without your love.
And even forever don't seem like long enough.
'Cause every time I breathe I take you in,
And my heart beats again
Baby I can't help it.
You keep me drowning in your love. And every time I try to rise above,
I'm swept away by love.
Baby I can't help it,
You keep me drowning in your love.
Maybe I'm a drifter,
Maybe not.
'Cause I have known the safety,
Of falling free into your arms. I don't need another lifeline,
It's not for me.
It's only you can save me.
Oh, can't you see?
I can't imagine life without your love.
And even forever don't seem like long enough.
(It don't seem like long enough, yeah)
'Cause every time I breathe I take you in,
And my heart beats again
Baby I can't help it.
You keep me drowning in your love.
And every time I try to rise above,
I'm swept away by love.
Baby I can't help it,
You keep me drowning in your love. Go on pull me under.
Cover me with dreams.
You know I can't resist.
'Cause you're the air that I breathe!
'Cause every time I breathe I take you in,
(Every time I breathe, yeah)
And my heart beats again
Baby I can't help it.
(Baby I can't help it)
You keep me drowning in your love.
And every time I try to rise above,
I'm swept away by love.
Baby I can't help it,
You keep me drowning in your love
Baby I can't help it,
You keep me drowning in your love.
Baby drowning.
Got me drowning.
Keep me drowning in your love.
Baby I can't help it.
(Can't help it, can't help it no no.)
Got me drowning. I can't imagine life without your love.
And even forever don't seem like long enough.
'Cause every time I breathe I take you in,
(I do)
And my heart beats again
(Oh yeah)
Baby I can't help it.
(Baby I can't help it)
You keep me drowning in your love.
And every time I try to rise above,
(Got me drowning)
I'm swept away by love.
Baby I can't help it,
You keep me drowning in your love.
what day is today? its malaysia day! hehe..but its a month already..eid celebration is going to an end..thanks to all my friend who came to my house..esspecially my besties..umar and reymi..long time no meeting u both..u guys growing so well..and u guys really awesome! we having fun, eating, lepaking & sharing lots of story..but now everyone of us going back to what we're doing.. :)
reymi, u r the most advance of all..always got straight A's..after primary school, u when to Sains Alam Shah, then PASUM, and UTM, and now u hv become the engineer of Petronas in Kerteh..u really a great person man! :))
umar, u always become a leader..after primary school, u when to Sains Hulu Selangor, then Ambang Asuhan Jepun UM ( i was suppose to go there too because i have basic japanese in school..but i made a crazy choice until now..lol ), and now u had flied back to japan..finishing ur last sem as mechanical eng student..gambattene! but what is awesome is when u said, u already got a job even u haven't finish ur stdy..a company already propose u and need u..haha..so damn lucky! i'm happy for u..=)
and as for me, is still a secret..nxt year when we meet, we'll see how k..lol ;)
me with umar
reymi, whats with the funny face..lol
11 years ago..
reymi standing with the blue tie..
me sat down with the blue uniform with umar beside me wearing the red tie..
everyone is so cute! :)
my friend,
men is not from mars..we always came from ur mom's tummy..but be like a sun, who burns itself for the universe..or be like a moon who lights the path in darkest night..everyday even if we are apart, even we are anywhere part of the globe, we'll see the same sun, the same moon..so see the beautiful sun and moon urself! haha..remember our friendship while appreciate the God creation..ok..adeus! :)
If you're leaving close the door.
I'm not expecting people anymore.
Hear me grieving, I'm lying on the floor.
Whether I'm drunk or dead I really ain't too sure.
I'm a blind man, I'm a blind man and my world is pale.
When a blind man cries, Lord, you know there ain't no sadder tale.
Had a friend once in a room,
Had a good time but it ended much too soon.
In a cold month in that room
We found a reason for the things we had to do.
I'm a blind man, I'm a blind man, now my room is cold.
When a blind man cries, Lord, you know he feels it from his soul.
last monday, i had some leisure time..
so i watched this japanese movie, 1 litre of tears..
it was a story of a girl who was chosen by this strange disease..incureable disease..one day, she started to walk unstably..and time to time, the likelihood of her falling increase..then she had difficulties in position herself and other objects..then she was be unable to write properly..following that, she was not be able to speak properly..for her, eventhough the progress of the disease is slow, it just get worse day by day..so sad..but, i was really touched when she wrote something like this..
i won't be impatient i won't be greedy i won't give up because everyone takes things step by step i'm not the only one in pain not havng other people undestand not undestanding others both of those are awful my life is like a blossoming flower from the start of my youth i want to have no regrets and treasure it mom, in my heart there always exists the mother that believes in me from now this point forward, i leave it to you i'm sorry for always making you worry this disease, why did it choose me? fate. it can't be put in words you really can't make people accept it i want to make a time machine to go back to the past if it wasn't for this disease maybe i could have succeeded in love i want to be hugged tightly by someone i really want to be i already don't want to say that i want to go back to that day i want to accept the me right now and live on eventhough i will also be hurt by those heartless glances but also, i understand that at the same time gentle glances exists eventhough it's like this, i still want to be here because here is, the place that i exist what's wrong with falling down? because as long as i stand up again it'll be just fine if you look up at the sky after falling down the blue sky is also today, stretching limitless and smiles at me people shouldn't dwell on the past it's enough to try your best in all that you're doing now mom, will i be able to get married?
that story..was almost the same that happened to one of my bestfriend..we were both from the same primary school..we both even received the best student award in 2001..but when she was 21, she died of incureable disease..the current medication technology on that time cannot cure her disease..a few days before she passed away, i called her..but i dunno that was the last time i talked to her..before she was in a coma..and gone forever..she asked me, why was the disease chose her..she suffered alone..i dunno what to say to her, but tried to calm her..then she thanked me for everything, for all these years, for the last time..she said that she was very happy knowing theres a friend who always cared for her, even she was in very a bad state..she really appreciated it..whenever she thought about the future, tears would be coming down..at one time, the doctor even had to make a hole on her neck to feed her..shes suffered enough..the time had come for her..at last shes gone to the place where theres no more tears..
God loves u more..i'm sorry..
T_T
note:
sometimes u will never know the true value of moments until it become memories..
making a hundred friends is not a miracle..
the miracle is to make a single friend who will stand by your side
kini dah hampir 2 minggu bpuase..mcm2 blaku dlm bulan ni..sronok sbb bile waktu azan maghrib tggu dpn tv1 nk dgr azan..pastu mcm2 lah iklan tv contohnye iklan kurma yusuf tayob ucap selamat bpuase..hehe..bile azan berkumandang pastu cpt2 berbuka..mlm2 plak dpt pergi semayang terawih, tgk ramai2 semangat nk buat ibadah..
ermmm..tp sedihnya..jauh dari kluarga..dan....hati rindu pd seseorang....hampir setiap hari pergi bazar ramadhan..tp penyudahnye bile blk umah sewa x beli ape2 pun..kwn2 pun kdg2 bertanye, tgh diet ke? sbnr nye xtau nk mkn ape..xde selera..berbuka mkn kurma ngn minum air je pun dah terase cukup..kdg2 klo lapar pun mkn oat ngn susu je..
bile weekend haritu, kwn2 pun blk rumah masing2..sy pun tinggal sorang2 je kt umah sewa..xde org..rasa teramatlah sunyi..bile terase sunyi ni org kata walaupun tgh mkn ayam pun terase mcm mkn ikan bilis..kenape mcm ni ek? hmm..rindu ke? selalu mimpi kn dia bile tdo mlm2..bile tersedar dr tdo pun teros bayangkan dia lg..awk, sy rindu..
lalu pd hari ahad yg lepas, petang2 tgh2 puase, berangkatlah sudah ke sebuah gunung utk mencari ketenangan..sendirian..sedih pun simpan dlm hati je..bkn ade org kisah pun..huhu..tp kt ctu mmg seronok..tenang..dpt menikmati keindahan ciptaan Tuhan..terkesima melihat keagungan ciptaanNya..buat seketika hilang keserabutan dlm fikiran..kalaulah dpt menikmati perkara mcm ni selalu..mesti indah kan..
beberapa gambar yg sempat sy amek sebelom kehabisan bateri kamera..hehe
air terjun :)
luas pemandangan..boleh naek bot untuk pergi ke pulau
rse mcm nk terjun je..hehe
peace~ v(^_^)..
note:
in life you will realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet..
some will test you..
some will use you..
and some will teach you..
but most important are the ones that bring out the best in you..
hmm..its already july..so much thing happened..i'm still building my future..so bz..even last weekend, saturday & sunday i worked..yeah..i hv to work hard..i hv to, bcoz theres still a lot more to earn in this adventurous & mysterious life..its not easy to gain what i plan..i hv to build it back..the thing i had lost..lots of it..only God knows how i felt..
suddenly i remembered something that my friend once said, "dear friend, no wonder u look so cool, theres something inside u that someone in ur age cannot even bear..everything came in one shot..so heavy..but u r really strong..someone could even become crazy or worse than that..but never give up..plan your work, and work your plan.." thank u friend, i really appreciate ur advised..yeah..and now i'm still working my plan..hopefully one fine day, miracle will happen..hopefully..=)
7 month already passed..without realising, my weight lost a little i guess..some of my friend and my fmly who haven`t met me for a long time said, "wow, y u r so thin and tall? r u on diet or something?" i will juz laugh out loud..hahaha..guyz, i`m not becoming taller, but i already lose 7 kilos in the past 7 month..is it too much? do u really think i`m working too hard or i'm juz worrying too much? haha..about 2 weeks more, month of Ramadhan will come, it will be a fasting month..will my weight lose more? we'll see.. :))
yesterday was a gathering for my batch in foundation of science agriculture in UPM..ex-asperianz..3rd generation..its already been 4 years since the last time i met u all..although only a few came, but still we had so much fun..talking, eating, gossiping, joking, and laughing..it was awesome! everyone seperated with their own way..some of them already finished their degree studies, some of them already continue with their studies in master, some of them were already working and also some of them were already married! wow..u guyz..time passing so fast..miss having fun with u all..=) hopefully someday we will meet again..
steamboat ..everyone eat a lot!
still continue talking even after we had already went out of the restraunt..=)
::p/s: u hv start working..i'm happy for u..plz do your best..gain as much experience as u can..i always pray for ur success.. ::
::: i keep myself bz with things to do..
but everytime i pause,
i still think of u...
i.m.y.. :::
i dun want to burden anyone around me.. even my family.. i hv something big to face real soon.. let me face all the difficulties alone.. let me take all the burden alone.. so that everyone around me will always smile.. Oh God..plz lend me the strengh..
one of my fav song.. make me always miss her.. so..i sang it over n over again..
I guess this time you're really leaving I heard your suitcase say goodbye And as my broken heart lies bleeding You say true love is suicide
You say you've cried a thousand rivers And now you're swimming for the shore You left me drowning in my tears And you won't save me anymore I'll pray to God to give me one more chance, girl
I'll be there for you These five words I swear to you When you breathe I want to be the air for you I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you I´ll steal the sun from the sky for you Words can't say what love can do I'll be there for you
I know you know we've had some good times Now they have their own hiding place I can promise you tomorrow But I can't buy back yesterday
And Baby you know my hands are dirty But I wanted to be your valentine I'll be the water when you get thirsty, baby When you get drunk, I'll be the wine
I'll be there for you These five words I swear to you When you breathe I want to be the air for you I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you I´ll steal the sun from the sky for you Words can't say what love can do I'll be there for you
And I wasn't there when you were happy I wasn't there when you were down I didn't mean to miss your birthday, baby I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out
I'll be there for you These five words I swear to you When you breathe I want to be the air for you I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you I´ll steal the sun from the sky for you Words can't say what love can do I'll be there for you
this one song.. always drive me crazy when i sang the chorus.. when u listened to the song, could u feel the passion..?
I’m gonna be a pilot soon
and sail through the sky.
If you think I cannot soar,
when have you seen me try?
I’m gonna be the best pilot
that you have ever seen
in leather goggles, leather hat,
and checkered scarf in green.
I’ll know the fancy airplane words
like aileron and stuff.
I’ll twist the dials and land with ease
when the weather gets real rough.
I’ll climb the sky and whirl around
so Earhart would be proud,
then make big barrel rolls and dives
To please the neighbor crowd.
I cannot wait to learn to fly!
For now, who cares if you laugh
Because when I get good,
you’ll want my autograph.
aircraft parked
pic i took from the control tower
my aircraft cockpit
the key is in my hand
its me..smile~ ^___^
And now 'tis man who dares assault the sky . . .
And as we come to claim our promised place,
Aim only to repay the good you gave,
And warm with human love the chill of space.
hopefully my dream to become an airlines pilot will come true..amin..=)
JUNE??
hohoho..the day came again! gemini man~ now i'm 23rd!! =))
so many things happen..its a busy month..
studying, working, plus...helping with my sis engagement this week..
bz is bz..but still got bday wishes from my family & frenz all over the world..
yeah..eventhough my mom n sis can't celebrate together today, they are in moscow..but they will come back home with my bday present from russia tomorow!!
haha..can`t wait for them to come!! miss them!! ^___^
sis & mom on vacation =)
but wait!!..this is wat my little sis n i did for my bday..,
DONUTS!!...its our 1st trial..
no one teach us..
juz using the recipe my sis got from her friend..lol =))
i think its not so bad for our 1st trial..
next time, maybe will look better and taste great..
how bout chocolate topping & ...... ;)
okay..then we went to celebrate my 23rd bday at
austin steak house at seksyen 7 bandar baru bangi
the scenery around the steak house is somehow like a cowboy bar
still waiting for mine to come
mix steak
fish & chips
golden blue chic
bday boy's combo steak!! =))
burrrppp..its was superb!! eventhough it was simple, but everyone was bloated!! hahaha..thanks to my bro for treating us..next time i`ll treat u for your bday okay!! =)
